Why We Kiss: The Fascinating Story Behind Our Favorite Romantic Pastime. History tradition, bonding, social behavior.
- Diane Black
- Jan 12, 2024
- 6 min read
Updated: Jul 15, 2024

Prepare your smoochers, sweetheart, because the art of kissing, bridging history, tradition, bonding, and social behavior, goes farther back than we thought, outdating even the earliest Valentine's Day celebrations.
Archaeological whispers reveal that behaviors akin to kissing—a timeless symbol of history, tradition, and social behavior bonding—graced our planet over 3,500 years ago, traced back to India's ancient Vedic Sanskrit texts. Furthermore, one of the first historical records of what we'd recognize as a romantic kiss popped up in ancient Egypt, with murals depicting Pharaohs tenderly bestowing kisses onto their wives.
Our journey through the history of this tradition and the evolution of social behavior and bonding takes us next to the ancient Greeks and Romans, who elevated the humble kiss to something more profound. They breathed life and significance into the act, believing that a person's breath and spirit were intertwined in the midst of a sweet kiss. The ever-so-organized Romans went a step further, categorizing kisses into the osculum (a friendly peck), the basium (a kiss brimming with affection), and the savolium (the deep, passionate kiss). It appears that the Romans certainly knew how to play the kissing game!
However, during the rather repressed Middle Ages, Christianity tightened the reins on kissing practices. Public kisses met with disdain, and even wedded couples were discouraged from engaging in open-mouthed kisses. What an unfortunate curb on natural affection!
Thankfully, the winds of the Renaissance brought about a renewed love for smooching, celebrating history, tradition, bonding, and social behavior in its passionate revival. Our renowned violator of norms, William Shakespeare, warmed hearts with mentions of kisses in over 30 of his plays and sonnets. Soaring ahead to the 19th century, the audacious French introduced the world to full-on tongue-kissing, which took the globe by storm, rippling out from France to England and beyond.
The next time the moment arrives for a lip lock with your dearly beloved, spare a thought for the generations of kissers who came before us. The act of the kiss, once perhaps reflectively humble, has journeyed long to blossom into the intoxicating language of love we cherish today. Here's a salute to the enduring romance of smooching, a testament to the power of history, tradition, bonding, and social behavior in shaping our expressions of love – after all, lovers, we've come a long, long way.
Smooching Through the Ages: How Kissing Has Changed Over Time.
Smooching in Ancient Times

We've been smooching since the dawn of civilization. Ancient Sanskrit texts and Egyptian wall paintings depict couples kissing. The earliest known literary reference to kissing dates back 3,500 years to India's Vedic Sanskrit texts. The Greeks and Romans also kissed, mainly as a greeting among friends and family. They preferred other, raunchier activities for romance.
The Middle Ages: When Kissing Was Dangerous
During the Middle Ages, the spread of Christianity led to some seriously anti-PDA (PUBLIC DISPLAY OF AFFECTION) rules. Kissing was forbidden in public, and even a quick peck on the cheek could land you in jail. Of course, people still found ways to sneak a kiss, making it all the more thrilling and forbidden.
The 1900s: Hollywood Makes Kissing Fashionable Again History tradition bonding social behavior kissing

Early films featured passionate kisses, sparking a craze for lip-locking and reviving the practice. Stars like Rudolf Valentino set hearts aflutter with their sizzling on-screen kisses. Kissing became popular again and a symbol of romance, passion, and courtship.
Whether a friendly peck or full-on makeout sesh, kissing connects us in a way that transcends time. Pucker up - your lips have a long and lusty history behind them!
Why Do We Kiss? The Psychology and Social Behavior Behind This Romantic Ritual
Why do we kiss? Turns out there's some seriously fascinating science behind this romantic ritual.
Chemistry
When you kiss someone, your brain releases chemicals like dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin that make you feel good and boost your mood. Oxytocin, in particular, is known as the "love hormone"—it strengthens feelings of affection and attachment to your partner. No wonder kissing feels so addictive!
Instinct
Kissing is also deeply instinctual. We're born with the impulse to kiss, probably because infants show affection for their parents through kissing-like behaviors. As we age, kissing becomes strongly associated with romantic love and arousal.
Connection
A kiss forges an intimate connection with someone, both physically and emotionally. When you kiss, you share touch, scent, taste, and saliva with your partner—all of which provide information about them and the potential for compatibility. Kissing also triggers the release of endorphins that decrease pain and increase pleasure centers in the brain, leaving you with a sense of closeness and euphoria.
Whether it's a quick peck or full-on makeout sesh, kissing brings us together in a way that's both primal and personal. We kiss to say, "I like you," "I want you," and "I care about you." No wonder kissing has been an essential part of human courtship for as long as, well, humans have been courting one another! The science and psychology behind this sweetest of rituals proves that a kiss isn't just a kiss—for humans, it's a way to forge intimate social bonds and experience pleasure, joy and delight. Pucker up!
The Art of the Kiss: Different Types of Kisses and What They Mean
The Sweet Kiss

The sweet, romantic kiss we all dream of - a gentle caress of lips that makes your heart flutter. This kiss says "I adore you" and stirs feelings of tenderness. It's ideal for a first kiss or when you want to express affection without getting too steamy. Keep it light, keep it sweet.
The French Kiss
Feeling adventurous? The French kiss, also known as tongue kissing, takes things to the next level. This passionate kiss allows you to explore your partner's mouth with your tongue, tasting and teasing them. It's a sensual, intimate kiss meant to ignite desire and arousal. Go slowly, avoid bumping teeth, and follow your partner's lead. Ooh la la!
The Quick Peck
Sometimes you want a little kiss, a quick meeting of lips. This fast, playful smooch shows you care but keeps things casual. It's perfect for when you're in a rush or in public. A quick peck can be a cute, flirty way to say hello or goodbye to your sweetheart.
The Eskimo Kiss
An Eskimo kiss, or nose kiss, is one of the most adorable displays of affection. Gently rub noses with your partner, enjoying the closeness and intimacy. This sweet nuzzle is especially perfect for shy folks or romantic types. Originally popular among Eskimo tribes, this unusual kiss has become popular worldwide. Give it a try - your inner child will thank you!
Kissing comes in many forms, each with its own charm. Experiment with different types of kisses to find what you and your partner enjoy. A kiss, no matter how small, is the perfect way to strengthen your connection and show you care. Pucker up!
Keeping the Spark Alive: How Kissing Benefits Relationships
Girl, don't even try to tell me you're not into kissing. We both know that would be a lie. Kissing is the best thing ever. It's intimate, it's romantic, and it's downright fun. But kissing isn't just about chemistry and passion—it actually does your relationship a lot of good. Here are a few reasons why kissing keeps the spark alive:
It releases oxytocin, the "love hormone."
When you kiss, oxytocin is released in your brain, making you feel warm and fuzzy. This hormone strengthens feelings of affection and attachment to your partner. The more you kiss, the more oxytocin is released and the more bonded you'll feel.
It reduces stress and anxiety.
Had a rough day? Kissing eases tension and calms nerves. Studies show that kissing lowers levels of the stress hormone cortisol while increasing endorphins, your body's natural painkillers and mood boosters. Kiss away that bad day, and hello to relaxation!
It boosts self-esteem.
Are you feeling insecure? Let your partner plant one on you. Kissing activates the reward center in your brain, giving you a rush of dopamine, which makes you feel good about yourself and your partner.
It spices things up in the bedroom.
If your sex life needs revival, start with kissing. It increases arousal and gets you in the mood for more. Kissing leads to touching, touching leads to...well, you know the rest!
Keep the kisses coming, and your relationship will burn brighter than ever. Smooching: the gift that keeps on giving! Pucker up, buttercup. Your kiss is the key to everlasting love and happiness. Mwah!
Last note: You know you want to pucker up. Kissing is quite literally in your DNA, an evolutionary instinct we've inherited from our primate ancestors. So the next time you find yourself drawn into a romantic lip lock, remember you're participating in an ancient human tradition. Kissing connects us, bonds us, signifies affection, and just plain feels good. What started as a primitive gesture has blossomed into an intimate art form. Kissing is here to stay, so embrace your inner romantic and get out there and smooch - whether it's a quick peck, a passionate snog, or an epic fairytale kiss to awaken your sleeping beauty or prince. The story of kissing is your story, so make it a good one!
Sources:
Smithsonian Magazine
Psychology Today: The History of Kissing
Medium: The Evolution of the Kiss: Tracing its Historical Origins
The Conversation: Earliest evidence of kissing pushed back 1,000 years
Shakespeare's Works
Time: The Science of Smooching: Why Men and Women Kiss Differently
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